The Wheel - Part Three
Aug. 25th, 2005 09:05 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
new_kateTitle: The Wheel
Author: Newkate
Fandom: Saiyuki
Warnings: Reincarnation fic. This part is NC-17 for m/m smut and some language.
Notes: According to my first outline, this part was supposed to be PG-13 *facepalms*
Betaed by![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
hibem.
Part One: Shift
Part Two: Dance
Part 3: Experiment (Ch. 1 of 4)
2098
“I have to go.”
He stabbed his cigarette into an ashtray, shifted closer to the edge of my bed. Slow, slow movements, as if his pleasantly tired limbs were too heavy, as if the chill of the room was too hard to take after the warm blankets, as if he was silently begging me to stop him.
“Oh, I’m sure you can stay a little bit longer.”
A kiss on the lips would undo him in a moment and we both knew it, so he turned his face away, giving me full access to his long, strong, tanned neck. Sometimes this whole affair was just like a bodice ripper with him as a beautiful redhead heroine. I guess I was cast as the pirate.
I dove for his neck, nuzzling, licking and nipping. His skin was sex-soft, sweat-slick, bed-warm. He squirmed and twisted in my arms, his breath took on a ragged note of desperation. Tiny round nipples were pebble-hard against my palms, his hands were tangled in the sheets, listless and useless, he was at my mercy.
I slid off the bed, kneeling, and the cool, dry, too-conditioned air hit me from all sides, clearing the post-coital lethargy. He whined at the loss of my hands and mouth, but then he saw me there, waiting, and that was it. He had to have it. This man was such a slave to his own body, always pulled around by its capricious urges, and it broke his heart every time he had to say ‘no’ to himself. So he rarely did, and I could only welcome it.
His cock was already half-hard when I touched it with my lips. Drying sperm, musk, hint of latex, - it could hardly be naturally exciting, yet, perhaps because of the learned reflex, it was undeniably inspiring. Just like his fingers in my hair, just like the tiny moans escaping from the back of his throat, just like his thighs trembling against my sides. It was as practical as any form of worship – I was on my knees, high from the rush, I gave, and the feedback was almost blinding in its intensity.
“I love this,” I admitted, pulling back for a little rest, cradling his cock in my palms. He almost sobbed. “I want to do this in my lab, so I can think about you during tests.”
“Don’t you… already?”
“You know what I mean. Wouldn’t you like that? I have many fun toys there.”
“Don’t want to know…”
Lick, lick, kiss. Think about it, Colonel. That’s right.
“Maybe your office then? I’ve never been in the security room.”
“Well of course you haven’t, you’re not supposed to… Please, don’t stop, you’re killing me here!”
I gave his penis another short tongue-bath, then wrapped my fingers around it again. My hands were shaking, almost imperceptibly. This was stimulating in ways I’ve never anticipated.
“No one needs to know. It will be rather exciting. Do you have a desk? I want you to bend me over it. I want to mark it.”
“Oooh…. Please…” he jerked in my hand, strong, involuntary muscular spasms. This had to be almost painful for him by now. I took pity and let his erection slip past my lips, along my tongue, deeper, closed my eyes, carefully controlling my breathing, and swallowed the rounded head into my throat. It came easier than all my previous attempts. It actually worked this time.
He howled and shook against me, pushed to a climax more by surprise than actual stimulation, I would imagine. I pulled away, and that was harder to control. The semen was everywhere, the motion went the wrong way, I was certain I would vomit and ruin the moment, but somehow I’ve managed. I was still breathing through it, braced on my hands and knees, when he scooped me up in his arms and pulled me back onto the bed.
Sometimes his body felt bigger than it actually was. It felt like he was enveloping me, wrapped all around me, touching everywhere, skin to skin.
“Didn’t know you could do that,” he said, wiping moisture from my face. Why would this activity inflame tear ducts? Something to read up on.
“Neither did I. I wanted to impress you.”
He laughed, peppered my jaw with kisses, pried my lips apart with his tongue. I did not want to kiss any more, but he was gentle. He licked burning flesh and blew cool air on it. That was pleasant.
“You are hard as a rock,” he said, stroking me with his fingertips. “What would you like?”
“Don’t you have to go?”
He stilled.
“Well, I wouldn’t leave you hanging.”
“Why are you in such a hurry, by the way, do you have another date?”
“No. Do you really think I could survive having more sex than we do?”
“You don’t go on duty for another thirteen hours. You could sleep here.”
That would be a new step. I was wary of making it, but I wanted to move forward.
“Too risky. I can’t be seen here,” he said, and I definitely detected a hint of regret in his voice.
“Why, do they still kick people out of the army for that?”
“Not really. It’s because of you.”
“Oh, I feel special.”
“You should. You are.”
And as much as I expected something like that to happen, I still winced at his words, but only a little. He tightened his arms around me and kissed a vertebra. He could be strange at times.
“It’s the clearance levels we have. Nobody here has them combined, I doubt even vice-president does. If someone knew we were close, one of us would be transferred away. Me, most likely.”
“We’re close?” that was a futile masochistic exercise on my part, but I’d never claimed I didn’t have kinks.
“I’m close. You I often don’t get, but I suppose it’s just how you huge brain works,” he pressed his lips to the top of my head, right at the joining of the skull seams.
“Huh.”
“You’re still hard,” he reached out with his hand again. “Can I blow you?”
“I don’t know, can you?”
“Sometimes you don’t like that.”
“Today is not that kind of day.”
He arranged me on my back, knelt between my thighs, braced my legs on his shoulders. As I crossed my ankles behind his neck, I felt tired. Raw. Empty.
He took me in, and it was a little bit better.
Sometimes I didn’t like that. Too open, too close, too human. But the truth was undeniable: I was in love with his mouth. That was the first thing about him that took my breath away. Wide, sensual, full lips arranged in a perpetual smirk. Except for the moments when the smirk gave way to a beautiful warm smile, or a little crestfallen pout, or when those lips parted a little in an expression of rapt attention. When I first saw him with a cigarette in his mouth, I could only stare and stifle moans. He didn’t smoke it: he sucked on it, rolled it around, gave the filter little absent-minded licks inside his mouth, worried it with his teeth. The sight nearly drove me into sex-stupid frenzy. I wanted to see this mouth open to let my cock in, and that happened faster than I could have expected.
He always closed his eyes when he did that, as if overwhelmed by sensation. Maybe it wasn’t the reason, but I had my own little fantasies. He could carry on doing it for up to twenty minutes, as he proven once, never breaking the rhythm, which, I could only assume, took a lot of practice. Yet it was never mechanical coming from him – it was a caress softer than any other, a wordless expression of hell knows what in his own secret language. It often took me by surprise no matter how hard I tried to brace myself for it.
His hair was too short to grab, so I stroked it instead, mindlessly urging him on. His lips were taking on darker, blood-flushed tint as he continued to slide them back and forth over my length, his face was a picture of calm, pleasured concentration. He quickened the pace somewhat and reached down to stroke himself. I could not see, but that could only mean he’s ready for me again.
“Stop, stop, please, I want you to have me,” it came out in little gasps, desperate enough that he obeyed without a word. That is, he let go of my penis and reached for my mouth with his swollen, abused, moist lips. My brain shut down on that, and my body did it all on his own – the greedy kiss that almost drew blood, the tackle that nearly toppled us both from the bed, but it worked, and I was astride him. His eyes were shining in open wonder, so naked and pure. I simply had to fuck him, there and then, hard and fast.
There was still plenty of lubricant inside me, and the glide, stretch and burn were perfect. I rocked on top of him, one hand caressing his scrotum, the other bracing me against his shoulder. He held me like something fragile, despite for a fact that his hips were snapping upwards with near brutal force, trailed his fingers over my chest and my face.
“You are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”
“Faster.”
“I want us to hook up again after we’re reposted.”
“Of course,” I moaned, gritting my teeth as my release kept building up, drawing closer. “Yes, me too.”
I stroked myself to completion with him relentlessly moving inside me and fell off him, face down. He twisted around, slid on top of me and entered me again, and this time it hurt for some reason; I’d probably damaged myself by being overenthusiastic. He fucked me for several minutes, and I could feel him trying to hurry up and let me rest.
“Oh,” he said, finally pulling out, softening but still large. Now that really hurt. “We forgot the condom.”
“We’re both clean, but yes, sorry.”
I didn’t want to move. I was comfortable there, face in the pillows, the quiet sound of his breathing the only indication of his presence. I didn’t want him to touch me.
He did anyway. He could never stop touching me, as if physical contact was reassuring for him somehow. That was how he was. Physical. Honest. Uncomplicated.
I would be the first one to admit that despite vigorous exercise of mental discipline some of my ideas were better than the others. This tryst was clearly not among the stellar ones. Still, it was already in progress, so one might as well accept the results and work with them.
“Oh, now I have to go,” I said. “I keep forgetting about my other commitments.”
“Did you switch shifts again?”
“The lab is closed today, we’re running calculations. It’s a private affair.”
“A date?”
I frowned into the pillow. This joke was already in a poor taste when I came up with it; he had no good reason to repeat it.
“Hmm. I think it might be. Depends on how I play it.”
Oh, that felt good. I sensed his shock, and when I turned around, he was blatantly trying to brush that off as banter.
Damn, it wasn’t worth it. I prided myself on having better impulse control… maybe these things literally did rub off?
“I’m kidding. He’s an old friend. I won’t lie to you, the attraction is there, but he was always too repressed to act on it, so that ship has sailed.”
He actually breathed in relief. Sometimes I wanted to kick him.
“I should leave first, so we aren’t seen together,” he said and started dressing. He pulled his clothes on right over splashes of my sperm still clinging to his skin, completely ignoring my pointed looks of disapproval.
He wanted to kiss me before he left. I wanted to kiss him as well. So we did.
After a lot of consideration, I’ve decided that I didn’t really need a shower after all.
*-*-*
“You reek of sex,” said Kieran, wrinkling his nose.
“And you don’t,” I took another sip of our vending-machine-mudwater-special tea. “Frankly I’m surprised you can identify the smell.”
“You’re too careless. People will start to talk.”
“Feh.”
“It will be inconvenient.”
“Ah, you’re right, I suppose. So what did you bring me today?”
He passed me a disk. Something in the way he was holding it suggested that the price for this data was high even for him.
“We are running out of time,” he said. “Uncle says he’ll buy as another week, but…”
“I thought you wanted to leave him out of this, Kieran.”
“I did. But you know how he is. Always jumping bullets for me, that old idiot. And it’s not like we have the luxury of refusing help.”
“True. It’s harder for me to factor him in our plans, however.”
“Don’t worry about it. How are you progressing? Tell me you actually getting something out of it, besides that ridiculous smile.”
“I have a smile?”
“Not today. Often. It’s appalling. Takes over hundred IQ points right off you. Well, you still look smarter than your so-called boyfriend, but…”
I had no idea I had such a smile. The thought amused me.
“Here it is,” said Kieran, rudely pointing his finger at my face. “Disgusting. It’s been ten years since I wanted to slug you this much. You do remember how this ends, right?”
Speaking of IQ points…
“Nobody knows how this will end. We are playing blind, with about 30% chance of success. I thought we both understood that. You know, Kieran, this might be your last chance to find out what all the fuss is about.”
He glared, clearly hoping it will have the same effect on me as it did on his maid or his uncle. I couldn’t help but giggle.
“Are you offering?” he snarled.
“I don’t think I could survive having more sex than I do.”
“Oh shit,” he said, cringing. “Your fucking smile has a second stage.”
I have not been myself lately. It was becoming harder to stay calm, to concentrate, to control my thought processes. I blamed the stress, since all symptoms fit. I was also much more emotional, and my emotions sometimes took unpredictable turns.
My oldest friend sat opposite me in our half-empty canteen, elbows on the table, handsome face screwed up in exaggerated irritation and disgust. He lost some weight in the last month, and he was underfed before. Now his wrists seemed almost transparent, eyes appeared even bigger on his pale pinched face, he looked tired, restless and very young.
“I do love you, Kieran,” I said softly. He jumped in his chair and stared at me in dismay.
“I knew that you hooking up with that guy was a bad idea,” he said. “But I never thought it would screw you up so deeply.”
“It was a bad idea, I agree. Regardless…” I took another sip of cold, tasteless liquid. “I know all there is to know about our security setup. I have all the schedules. I will have the code algorithms by tomorrow, if the cleaners do not reboot my server again. I’m working on creating a window of opportunity. We’re almost ready on this side, so now it’s up to you.”
“I’ve included several proposed plans on that disk. Tell me what you think,” he paused. “I want to see him.”
*-*-*
“Hi, Sam,” said Kieran, smiling. It never stopped being amusing as well as distressing. Kieran didn’t do “smiling”. He grinned, smirked and sneered; he bared his teeth and curled his lips back. He simply wasn’t a smiling type.
And he had the gall to make fun of my facial expressions. To his credit, he was probably completely unaware of what his face was doing.
“Hi, Kieran,” said the Child and reached out with a thin arm still bearing marks from the last test. Kieran looked at them, pained, and took that small hand in his. The Child rose from the floor where he sat for the last several hours, perfectly still, and pressed himself against Kieran, hiding his round face somewhere in my friend’s stomach.
When I first saw them doing that I nearly had a heart attack. But nothing happened.
They rarely talked. They sat together a lot, walked around the lab or just inside Sam’s cell, held hands, cuddled. Sometimes I read little spikes, but they weren’t connected with anything in particular I could put my finger on. If anything, Kieran made all the readings more stable.
“Tadashi smells of Eric,” said Sam.
“That’s because they are both pigs,” said Kieran and gingerly touched scabs on Sam’s arms. “Does it hurt?”
“Not any more. Will you come see me tomorrow?”
“I’ll try. It will all end soon. Remember what I’ve promised?”
“Yes. But Tadashi said you might not be able to keep your promise, not because you didn’t mean it, but…”
“He’s an idiot with the manners of baboon and discretion of a dog in heat.”
“Isn’t he a pig?” asked Sam innocently. He was developing fast.
“Keep laughing at the man who feeds your chocolate habit and you’re in for a nasty withdrawal,” I said, affecting a glower. Sam hid behind Kieran and giggled. The boy was unbearably cute once you got past the first shock of his appearance, the eyes were simply amazing, especially when lit with this much excitement and contentment. I watched as Kieran ruffled Sam’s wild brown hair, wishing I could do the same, not just try to encourage him with words and cheer him up with junk food.
The lab door opened, and someone entered. We were inside the cell, not seen from the entrance; Kieran silently flashed me a distressed glance, but I shook my head - at this time it could only be one of my assistants, whom I could always kick out as I often did.
“Sam!” called the visitor. I recognised the voice and froze on the spot, gaping, while the boy let go of Kieran and ran out of the cell, screaming: “Eric!”
I had a sick vision of them crashing into each other simply by accident, but it didn’t happen. The monitors buzzed a warning, and they both stopped.
“Wow, kid, did they forget to lock you up?”
“As if they would! Tadashi’s here, and... Oh.”
“Oh, shit.”
I walked out of the cell, trying to compose my face. The problem was that I couldn’t decide on what I wanted to portray. Surprise? Shock? Lack of understanding? Lack of reaction? I settled on a non-committal polite smile.
“Can I help you, Swenson?”
They were both rooted in place, sporting similar guilty grins like cats caught with their paws in a fish tank. Eric had a baseball in his hand and several chocolate bars sticking out of his pockets. I would laugh if this were just a little bit less serious.
Eric shifted his body ever so slightly, but his whole posture was suddenly screaming, “Come here, loverboy”. As blatant a manipulation it was, it didn’t fail to make me momentarily short of breath.
“I thought I was invited, Akiyama-san.”
“You were. But, first, I told you I would be out with my friend all afternoon.”
“Oh, I forgot. I guess you’ve changed your plans, huh?”
“And second, you do not have any keys to this place. At least if one should trust the security protocols.”
“Door was open.”
“It wasn’t.”
Sam was turning his head back and forth between us, eyes huge and frightened. Of course, seeing parental figures being antagonistic is always traumatic, but I was a scientist, ergo a heartless bastard. I tortured and cut this child on a regular basis. I could do what needed to be done.
“So Sam, does Eric come to play with you often?”
Eric’s eyes were locked on Sam, a silent warning, a plea. The Child fidgeted like any little boy caught between a rock and a hard place and hung his head.
“You’ve kept a secret from me. It’s very good, Sam, I’m proud of you, it was hard to do and shows how strong and grown up you are. But now you have to tell me.”
“Akiyama, stop this,” said Eric. “Leave him out of it, let’s talk like adults.”
“Oh, we will. In a minute. Sam, does Eric let you out of your room? Does he open that door?”
“Tadashi, I can’t say, it’s a secret,” he whined and looked at me with wet, quivering eyes. “Please don’t make me!”
The lab filled with low buzz, nothing seriously dangerous, just a little spike.
“Don’t do that, Sam. Answer my questions.”
“For fuck’s sake, you jerk, stop it!” snarled Kieran, running out of the cell. He grabbed the boy into his arms and held him close as Sam wrapped his arms around the man’s neck, almost sobbing. Eric gasped.
I was getting seasick from tables being turned.
“Did you fix him?” asked Eric in such a soft, hopeful voice, that I desperately wanted to jump him there and then. “Did you actually…”
He took a step closer to them. The quieted buzz returned, and he hastily moved back.
“No, it’s just Mr Flaherty. I’m looking into it.”
“Hi, Mr Flaherty,” said Eric. “Who can not possibly be cleared to enter the cell, much like me. You know, Akiyama, it’s strange that this great development, first ever successful physical contact with the Child, is nowhere to be found in you extensive reports. So does Mr Flaherty come to play here often?”
“Back off, Swenson,” barked Kieran. “Don’t poke around things that are too big for you.”
“Hmm, I’ve heard that before,” purred Eric, his nostrils flaring. “You’d be surprised how well I can handle really big things.”
Kieran’s glare should be burning a hole in Eric’s skull by now, but he met it head on, with a wide obscene smile I came to adore lately. They stared each other down, ready to lock horns. The sight was quite inspiring.
“Well,” I said amiably, fighting the urge to adjust myself. “We are all guilty of small infractions against the protocol. Should we go through channels and cause each other a lot of grief, or should we simply forget this ever happened?”
Eric laughed, while Kieran frowned and Sam blinked in confusion.
“Sure,” he nodded lightly. “If we all agree. Sam, do you still want to play?”
“Catch!” happily yelped the boy. “Kieran, Tadashi, do you want to play catch with us? It’s so much fun!”
Next chapter
Author: Newkate
Fandom: Saiyuki
Warnings: Reincarnation fic. This part is NC-17 for m/m smut and some language.
Notes: According to my first outline, this part was supposed to be PG-13 *facepalms*
Betaed by
hibem.Part One: Shift
Part Two: Dance
Part 3: Experiment (Ch. 1 of 4)
2098
“I have to go.”
He stabbed his cigarette into an ashtray, shifted closer to the edge of my bed. Slow, slow movements, as if his pleasantly tired limbs were too heavy, as if the chill of the room was too hard to take after the warm blankets, as if he was silently begging me to stop him.
“Oh, I’m sure you can stay a little bit longer.”
A kiss on the lips would undo him in a moment and we both knew it, so he turned his face away, giving me full access to his long, strong, tanned neck. Sometimes this whole affair was just like a bodice ripper with him as a beautiful redhead heroine. I guess I was cast as the pirate.
I dove for his neck, nuzzling, licking and nipping. His skin was sex-soft, sweat-slick, bed-warm. He squirmed and twisted in my arms, his breath took on a ragged note of desperation. Tiny round nipples were pebble-hard against my palms, his hands were tangled in the sheets, listless and useless, he was at my mercy.
I slid off the bed, kneeling, and the cool, dry, too-conditioned air hit me from all sides, clearing the post-coital lethargy. He whined at the loss of my hands and mouth, but then he saw me there, waiting, and that was it. He had to have it. This man was such a slave to his own body, always pulled around by its capricious urges, and it broke his heart every time he had to say ‘no’ to himself. So he rarely did, and I could only welcome it.
His cock was already half-hard when I touched it with my lips. Drying sperm, musk, hint of latex, - it could hardly be naturally exciting, yet, perhaps because of the learned reflex, it was undeniably inspiring. Just like his fingers in my hair, just like the tiny moans escaping from the back of his throat, just like his thighs trembling against my sides. It was as practical as any form of worship – I was on my knees, high from the rush, I gave, and the feedback was almost blinding in its intensity.
“I love this,” I admitted, pulling back for a little rest, cradling his cock in my palms. He almost sobbed. “I want to do this in my lab, so I can think about you during tests.”
“Don’t you… already?”
“You know what I mean. Wouldn’t you like that? I have many fun toys there.”
“Don’t want to know…”
Lick, lick, kiss. Think about it, Colonel. That’s right.
“Maybe your office then? I’ve never been in the security room.”
“Well of course you haven’t, you’re not supposed to… Please, don’t stop, you’re killing me here!”
I gave his penis another short tongue-bath, then wrapped my fingers around it again. My hands were shaking, almost imperceptibly. This was stimulating in ways I’ve never anticipated.
“No one needs to know. It will be rather exciting. Do you have a desk? I want you to bend me over it. I want to mark it.”
“Oooh…. Please…” he jerked in my hand, strong, involuntary muscular spasms. This had to be almost painful for him by now. I took pity and let his erection slip past my lips, along my tongue, deeper, closed my eyes, carefully controlling my breathing, and swallowed the rounded head into my throat. It came easier than all my previous attempts. It actually worked this time.
He howled and shook against me, pushed to a climax more by surprise than actual stimulation, I would imagine. I pulled away, and that was harder to control. The semen was everywhere, the motion went the wrong way, I was certain I would vomit and ruin the moment, but somehow I’ve managed. I was still breathing through it, braced on my hands and knees, when he scooped me up in his arms and pulled me back onto the bed.
Sometimes his body felt bigger than it actually was. It felt like he was enveloping me, wrapped all around me, touching everywhere, skin to skin.
“Didn’t know you could do that,” he said, wiping moisture from my face. Why would this activity inflame tear ducts? Something to read up on.
“Neither did I. I wanted to impress you.”
He laughed, peppered my jaw with kisses, pried my lips apart with his tongue. I did not want to kiss any more, but he was gentle. He licked burning flesh and blew cool air on it. That was pleasant.
“You are hard as a rock,” he said, stroking me with his fingertips. “What would you like?”
“Don’t you have to go?”
He stilled.
“Well, I wouldn’t leave you hanging.”
“Why are you in such a hurry, by the way, do you have another date?”
“No. Do you really think I could survive having more sex than we do?”
“You don’t go on duty for another thirteen hours. You could sleep here.”
That would be a new step. I was wary of making it, but I wanted to move forward.
“Too risky. I can’t be seen here,” he said, and I definitely detected a hint of regret in his voice.
“Why, do they still kick people out of the army for that?”
“Not really. It’s because of you.”
“Oh, I feel special.”
“You should. You are.”
And as much as I expected something like that to happen, I still winced at his words, but only a little. He tightened his arms around me and kissed a vertebra. He could be strange at times.
“It’s the clearance levels we have. Nobody here has them combined, I doubt even vice-president does. If someone knew we were close, one of us would be transferred away. Me, most likely.”
“We’re close?” that was a futile masochistic exercise on my part, but I’d never claimed I didn’t have kinks.
“I’m close. You I often don’t get, but I suppose it’s just how you huge brain works,” he pressed his lips to the top of my head, right at the joining of the skull seams.
“Huh.”
“You’re still hard,” he reached out with his hand again. “Can I blow you?”
“I don’t know, can you?”
“Sometimes you don’t like that.”
“Today is not that kind of day.”
He arranged me on my back, knelt between my thighs, braced my legs on his shoulders. As I crossed my ankles behind his neck, I felt tired. Raw. Empty.
He took me in, and it was a little bit better.
Sometimes I didn’t like that. Too open, too close, too human. But the truth was undeniable: I was in love with his mouth. That was the first thing about him that took my breath away. Wide, sensual, full lips arranged in a perpetual smirk. Except for the moments when the smirk gave way to a beautiful warm smile, or a little crestfallen pout, or when those lips parted a little in an expression of rapt attention. When I first saw him with a cigarette in his mouth, I could only stare and stifle moans. He didn’t smoke it: he sucked on it, rolled it around, gave the filter little absent-minded licks inside his mouth, worried it with his teeth. The sight nearly drove me into sex-stupid frenzy. I wanted to see this mouth open to let my cock in, and that happened faster than I could have expected.
He always closed his eyes when he did that, as if overwhelmed by sensation. Maybe it wasn’t the reason, but I had my own little fantasies. He could carry on doing it for up to twenty minutes, as he proven once, never breaking the rhythm, which, I could only assume, took a lot of practice. Yet it was never mechanical coming from him – it was a caress softer than any other, a wordless expression of hell knows what in his own secret language. It often took me by surprise no matter how hard I tried to brace myself for it.
His hair was too short to grab, so I stroked it instead, mindlessly urging him on. His lips were taking on darker, blood-flushed tint as he continued to slide them back and forth over my length, his face was a picture of calm, pleasured concentration. He quickened the pace somewhat and reached down to stroke himself. I could not see, but that could only mean he’s ready for me again.
“Stop, stop, please, I want you to have me,” it came out in little gasps, desperate enough that he obeyed without a word. That is, he let go of my penis and reached for my mouth with his swollen, abused, moist lips. My brain shut down on that, and my body did it all on his own – the greedy kiss that almost drew blood, the tackle that nearly toppled us both from the bed, but it worked, and I was astride him. His eyes were shining in open wonder, so naked and pure. I simply had to fuck him, there and then, hard and fast.
There was still plenty of lubricant inside me, and the glide, stretch and burn were perfect. I rocked on top of him, one hand caressing his scrotum, the other bracing me against his shoulder. He held me like something fragile, despite for a fact that his hips were snapping upwards with near brutal force, trailed his fingers over my chest and my face.
“You are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”
“Faster.”
“I want us to hook up again after we’re reposted.”
“Of course,” I moaned, gritting my teeth as my release kept building up, drawing closer. “Yes, me too.”
I stroked myself to completion with him relentlessly moving inside me and fell off him, face down. He twisted around, slid on top of me and entered me again, and this time it hurt for some reason; I’d probably damaged myself by being overenthusiastic. He fucked me for several minutes, and I could feel him trying to hurry up and let me rest.
“Oh,” he said, finally pulling out, softening but still large. Now that really hurt. “We forgot the condom.”
“We’re both clean, but yes, sorry.”
I didn’t want to move. I was comfortable there, face in the pillows, the quiet sound of his breathing the only indication of his presence. I didn’t want him to touch me.
He did anyway. He could never stop touching me, as if physical contact was reassuring for him somehow. That was how he was. Physical. Honest. Uncomplicated.
I would be the first one to admit that despite vigorous exercise of mental discipline some of my ideas were better than the others. This tryst was clearly not among the stellar ones. Still, it was already in progress, so one might as well accept the results and work with them.
“Oh, now I have to go,” I said. “I keep forgetting about my other commitments.”
“Did you switch shifts again?”
“The lab is closed today, we’re running calculations. It’s a private affair.”
“A date?”
I frowned into the pillow. This joke was already in a poor taste when I came up with it; he had no good reason to repeat it.
“Hmm. I think it might be. Depends on how I play it.”
Oh, that felt good. I sensed his shock, and when I turned around, he was blatantly trying to brush that off as banter.
Damn, it wasn’t worth it. I prided myself on having better impulse control… maybe these things literally did rub off?
“I’m kidding. He’s an old friend. I won’t lie to you, the attraction is there, but he was always too repressed to act on it, so that ship has sailed.”
He actually breathed in relief. Sometimes I wanted to kick him.
“I should leave first, so we aren’t seen together,” he said and started dressing. He pulled his clothes on right over splashes of my sperm still clinging to his skin, completely ignoring my pointed looks of disapproval.
He wanted to kiss me before he left. I wanted to kiss him as well. So we did.
After a lot of consideration, I’ve decided that I didn’t really need a shower after all.
*-*-*
“You reek of sex,” said Kieran, wrinkling his nose.
“And you don’t,” I took another sip of our vending-machine-mudwater-special tea. “Frankly I’m surprised you can identify the smell.”
“You’re too careless. People will start to talk.”
“Feh.”
“It will be inconvenient.”
“Ah, you’re right, I suppose. So what did you bring me today?”
He passed me a disk. Something in the way he was holding it suggested that the price for this data was high even for him.
“We are running out of time,” he said. “Uncle says he’ll buy as another week, but…”
“I thought you wanted to leave him out of this, Kieran.”
“I did. But you know how he is. Always jumping bullets for me, that old idiot. And it’s not like we have the luxury of refusing help.”
“True. It’s harder for me to factor him in our plans, however.”
“Don’t worry about it. How are you progressing? Tell me you actually getting something out of it, besides that ridiculous smile.”
“I have a smile?”
“Not today. Often. It’s appalling. Takes over hundred IQ points right off you. Well, you still look smarter than your so-called boyfriend, but…”
I had no idea I had such a smile. The thought amused me.
“Here it is,” said Kieran, rudely pointing his finger at my face. “Disgusting. It’s been ten years since I wanted to slug you this much. You do remember how this ends, right?”
Speaking of IQ points…
“Nobody knows how this will end. We are playing blind, with about 30% chance of success. I thought we both understood that. You know, Kieran, this might be your last chance to find out what all the fuss is about.”
He glared, clearly hoping it will have the same effect on me as it did on his maid or his uncle. I couldn’t help but giggle.
“Are you offering?” he snarled.
“I don’t think I could survive having more sex than I do.”
“Oh shit,” he said, cringing. “Your fucking smile has a second stage.”
I have not been myself lately. It was becoming harder to stay calm, to concentrate, to control my thought processes. I blamed the stress, since all symptoms fit. I was also much more emotional, and my emotions sometimes took unpredictable turns.
My oldest friend sat opposite me in our half-empty canteen, elbows on the table, handsome face screwed up in exaggerated irritation and disgust. He lost some weight in the last month, and he was underfed before. Now his wrists seemed almost transparent, eyes appeared even bigger on his pale pinched face, he looked tired, restless and very young.
“I do love you, Kieran,” I said softly. He jumped in his chair and stared at me in dismay.
“I knew that you hooking up with that guy was a bad idea,” he said. “But I never thought it would screw you up so deeply.”
“It was a bad idea, I agree. Regardless…” I took another sip of cold, tasteless liquid. “I know all there is to know about our security setup. I have all the schedules. I will have the code algorithms by tomorrow, if the cleaners do not reboot my server again. I’m working on creating a window of opportunity. We’re almost ready on this side, so now it’s up to you.”
“I’ve included several proposed plans on that disk. Tell me what you think,” he paused. “I want to see him.”
*-*-*
“Hi, Sam,” said Kieran, smiling. It never stopped being amusing as well as distressing. Kieran didn’t do “smiling”. He grinned, smirked and sneered; he bared his teeth and curled his lips back. He simply wasn’t a smiling type.
And he had the gall to make fun of my facial expressions. To his credit, he was probably completely unaware of what his face was doing.
“Hi, Kieran,” said the Child and reached out with a thin arm still bearing marks from the last test. Kieran looked at them, pained, and took that small hand in his. The Child rose from the floor where he sat for the last several hours, perfectly still, and pressed himself against Kieran, hiding his round face somewhere in my friend’s stomach.
When I first saw them doing that I nearly had a heart attack. But nothing happened.
They rarely talked. They sat together a lot, walked around the lab or just inside Sam’s cell, held hands, cuddled. Sometimes I read little spikes, but they weren’t connected with anything in particular I could put my finger on. If anything, Kieran made all the readings more stable.
“Tadashi smells of Eric,” said Sam.
“That’s because they are both pigs,” said Kieran and gingerly touched scabs on Sam’s arms. “Does it hurt?”
“Not any more. Will you come see me tomorrow?”
“I’ll try. It will all end soon. Remember what I’ve promised?”
“Yes. But Tadashi said you might not be able to keep your promise, not because you didn’t mean it, but…”
“He’s an idiot with the manners of baboon and discretion of a dog in heat.”
“Isn’t he a pig?” asked Sam innocently. He was developing fast.
“Keep laughing at the man who feeds your chocolate habit and you’re in for a nasty withdrawal,” I said, affecting a glower. Sam hid behind Kieran and giggled. The boy was unbearably cute once you got past the first shock of his appearance, the eyes were simply amazing, especially when lit with this much excitement and contentment. I watched as Kieran ruffled Sam’s wild brown hair, wishing I could do the same, not just try to encourage him with words and cheer him up with junk food.
The lab door opened, and someone entered. We were inside the cell, not seen from the entrance; Kieran silently flashed me a distressed glance, but I shook my head - at this time it could only be one of my assistants, whom I could always kick out as I often did.
“Sam!” called the visitor. I recognised the voice and froze on the spot, gaping, while the boy let go of Kieran and ran out of the cell, screaming: “Eric!”
I had a sick vision of them crashing into each other simply by accident, but it didn’t happen. The monitors buzzed a warning, and they both stopped.
“Wow, kid, did they forget to lock you up?”
“As if they would! Tadashi’s here, and... Oh.”
“Oh, shit.”
I walked out of the cell, trying to compose my face. The problem was that I couldn’t decide on what I wanted to portray. Surprise? Shock? Lack of understanding? Lack of reaction? I settled on a non-committal polite smile.
“Can I help you, Swenson?”
They were both rooted in place, sporting similar guilty grins like cats caught with their paws in a fish tank. Eric had a baseball in his hand and several chocolate bars sticking out of his pockets. I would laugh if this were just a little bit less serious.
Eric shifted his body ever so slightly, but his whole posture was suddenly screaming, “Come here, loverboy”. As blatant a manipulation it was, it didn’t fail to make me momentarily short of breath.
“I thought I was invited, Akiyama-san.”
“You were. But, first, I told you I would be out with my friend all afternoon.”
“Oh, I forgot. I guess you’ve changed your plans, huh?”
“And second, you do not have any keys to this place. At least if one should trust the security protocols.”
“Door was open.”
“It wasn’t.”
Sam was turning his head back and forth between us, eyes huge and frightened. Of course, seeing parental figures being antagonistic is always traumatic, but I was a scientist, ergo a heartless bastard. I tortured and cut this child on a regular basis. I could do what needed to be done.
“So Sam, does Eric come to play with you often?”
Eric’s eyes were locked on Sam, a silent warning, a plea. The Child fidgeted like any little boy caught between a rock and a hard place and hung his head.
“You’ve kept a secret from me. It’s very good, Sam, I’m proud of you, it was hard to do and shows how strong and grown up you are. But now you have to tell me.”
“Akiyama, stop this,” said Eric. “Leave him out of it, let’s talk like adults.”
“Oh, we will. In a minute. Sam, does Eric let you out of your room? Does he open that door?”
“Tadashi, I can’t say, it’s a secret,” he whined and looked at me with wet, quivering eyes. “Please don’t make me!”
The lab filled with low buzz, nothing seriously dangerous, just a little spike.
“Don’t do that, Sam. Answer my questions.”
“For fuck’s sake, you jerk, stop it!” snarled Kieran, running out of the cell. He grabbed the boy into his arms and held him close as Sam wrapped his arms around the man’s neck, almost sobbing. Eric gasped.
I was getting seasick from tables being turned.
“Did you fix him?” asked Eric in such a soft, hopeful voice, that I desperately wanted to jump him there and then. “Did you actually…”
He took a step closer to them. The quieted buzz returned, and he hastily moved back.
“No, it’s just Mr Flaherty. I’m looking into it.”
“Hi, Mr Flaherty,” said Eric. “Who can not possibly be cleared to enter the cell, much like me. You know, Akiyama, it’s strange that this great development, first ever successful physical contact with the Child, is nowhere to be found in you extensive reports. So does Mr Flaherty come to play here often?”
“Back off, Swenson,” barked Kieran. “Don’t poke around things that are too big for you.”
“Hmm, I’ve heard that before,” purred Eric, his nostrils flaring. “You’d be surprised how well I can handle really big things.”
Kieran’s glare should be burning a hole in Eric’s skull by now, but he met it head on, with a wide obscene smile I came to adore lately. They stared each other down, ready to lock horns. The sight was quite inspiring.
“Well,” I said amiably, fighting the urge to adjust myself. “We are all guilty of small infractions against the protocol. Should we go through channels and cause each other a lot of grief, or should we simply forget this ever happened?”
Eric laughed, while Kieran frowned and Sam blinked in confusion.
“Sure,” he nodded lightly. “If we all agree. Sam, do you still want to play?”
“Catch!” happily yelped the boy. “Kieran, Tadashi, do you want to play catch with us? It’s so much fun!”
Next chapter
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no subject
Date: 2005-08-25 02:40 pm (UTC)Also, I'm getting a kick out of your choice for Mr. Flaherty's first name. Kieran sounds a lot like "Ki-rin" in my head (although I could be mispronouncing it?) and the idea of Sanzo equated with/named for a unicorn out of Chinese Mythology just kills me. Your ability to insert these little details makes your stories wonderfully vibrant... *blissed out*
no subject
Date: 2005-08-26 03:13 pm (UTC)Names in this fic are something I just quetly giggle over, never thinking anyone would pick up on my obscure references (not that there are no completely random names here), so that in particular made me melt. You are incredible. And to be honest *facepalms* I didn't even know about unicorns! I zoomed on kirin because of the connection with sages, and didn't bother to research enough to pick up the purity aspect! Oh, but this is so perfect. Thank you! *giggles* Poor virginal Mr Flaherty...
capitalizing on Treneka's comment--
Date: 2005-08-26 02:16 am (UTC)*bricked*
Re: capitalizing on Treneka's comment--
Date: 2005-08-26 03:21 pm (UTC)